The concept is that if 20,000 people agree to move to the same state, one with a small population like New Hampshire or Maine or Alaska or South Dakota, they can take over that state, repeal state taxes and wasteful state government programs, end the collaboration between state and federal law enforcement officials in enforcing unconstitutional laws, repeal laws regulating drugs and guns, end asset forfeiture and abuses of eminent domain, privatize utilities, and end inefficient regulations and monopolies.

    John Trubee saw an ad in a paper that said "Cowrite on a 50-50 basis, earn $20,000 royalties, send your song poems to ..." some outfit in Nashville, Tennessee which promised to write music to anyone's poem. Trubee said to himself: wouldn't it be fun to send these people the most ridiculous, stupid, vile, obscene, retarded lyrics to see their response? 
    What was their response? They recorded it. Listen to A Blind Man's Penis, certainly the only country western song with the line "The zebra spilled its plastinia on bemis and the gelatin fingers oozed electric marbles." You'll never stop laughing.

You can win $500 from the Fantasy Supreme Court League. Just scroll through their list of cases currently before the Supreme Court and submit your guesses concerning how they will vote.

"The precautions taken against thieves who open trunks, search bags, or ransack tills, consist in securing with cords and fastening with bolts and locks. This is what the world calls wit. But a strong thief comes and carries off the till on his shoulders, with box and bag, and runs away with them. His only fear is that the cords and locks should not be strong enough! Therefore, does not what the world used to call wit simply amount to saving up for the strong thief? And I venture to state that nothing of that which the world calls wit is otherwise than saving up for strong thieves; and nothing of that which the world calls sage wisdom is other than hoarding up for strong thieves." 
- Chuang Tzu -

According to a recent poll, 69% of Americans are against Hillary Clinton for President. A suspicious number if I've every heard one.

Let's say you were the Federal Government and you wanted a police state. One big hurdle would be the Posse Comitatus Act which forbids the military from engaging in domestic law enforcement. If you wanted the public to support your circumventing this act (which the Bush administration has openly claimed it wants to do), one way to do it would be to use Black Ops to instigate a domestic act of terrorism, say random shootings of innocent people from an expert sharpshooter with Arab origins so that when he's caught or shot, it looks like al Qaeda. When local law enforcement asks the Federal Government for assistance in apprehending this fiend, you would offer them a spy plane which, since it doesn't touch the ground, isn't STRICTLY a violation of the Act. Once the public accepts that they are helpless against domestic terror, accepting this small violation of the Posse Comitatus Act, you're one step closer to moving your troops anywhere you want.

If Bush weren't president, he couldn't sign the election reform bill, but if he had signed it before he was president, he wouldn't be president.

Sun Fun Products has reported an order of 153,000 4-ounce bottles of scentless SPF-15 sunscreen to be shipped to the US government's Defense Distribution Depot/San Joaquin in Tracy, CA. The order far exceeds the usual demand of 20,000 to 40,000 bottles twice a year.

Q: “How much does oil have to do with the assessment of the threat from Saddam Hussein? President Bush didn’t mention it.”

Fleischer: “I’m not sure I follow your question ...”

Q: “Most security analysts take a look at it and say oil is a central aspect to the nation’s security ... are you saying oil is not at all a factor in the president’s thinking?”

Fleischer: “I think when you take a look at what the United Nations voted for, what the Congress voted for, what President Clinton signed, and what President Bush supports, that is not a factor.”

Q: “So oil is not a factor?”

Fleischer: “That is not a factor...

Nothing more fun than building a house of cards other than tearing it down.

Can't find good service? Here's a list of all terrorist sites and the Internet providers who host them.

The Blair "dossier" tells us that, despite sanctions, Saddam was able to go on building weapons of mass destruction. All that nonsense about dual-use technology, the ban on children's pencils because lead could have a military use and our refusal to allow Iraq to import equipment to restore the water-treatment plants that we bombed in the Gulf War, was a sham. This terrible conclusion is the only moral one to be drawn from the 16 pages that supposedly detail the chemical, biological and nuclear horrors that the Beast of Baghdad has in store for us. The price was paid in the lives of hundreds of thousands of children.
 

Dear Dr. Hollywood,

My name is Reggie and I reside in Houston, Texas. I have many questions about writing and I don't know where to start. I have always wanted to become a writer, but never had time to actually produce a project. I am very aspiring and I have great ideas. What I am really looking for is a professional that would take me under their wing and guide me the right way. If possible I can only hope that you can help me by giving me some idea on where I should start or maybe you know someone here in Houston that I can talk to. 

Thank you kindly if you consider responding to this email. 

Kind regards, 
Reginald
NASA

Dear Reggie,

Thank you for braving time and space to contact me.
A beginning chef should start out by cooking himself a few meals rather than trying to open a restaurant. For a beginning writer, writing movies is the worst possible way to start, especially if your immediate goal is expressing yourself. It's easy, at least for me, to express myself through letters or journalism or short stories, but writing screenplays is like writing bills for congress. The goal of a bill is to get passed and goal of a screenplay is to cause the production of a motion picture. They're both political maneuvers that encompass dozens of skills, including, but certainly not limited to, the ability to write. 

The best advice I can give you is to simply start writing a certain amount every day. 500 words is a good place to start. Don't worry about format or what your wife will think when she reads it. Think of it as Sunday driving, when you're driving not to get anywhere but just for the fun of it, to get out of the house, to see something new, to make something up that never existed before. Make it an essay, a letter to the editor, hell, an e-mail to me, just get in the habit of writing something every single day. Writing is a skill that develops with practice, one that very easily becomes an addiction as you develop your ability to express yourself. 

If you're picturing movies in your head, what you're really doing is telling stories. Become a storyteller first without worrying about format, which can be the deadly enemy of creativity. If you're dead set on writing screenplays, you'll find there are dozens and dozens of rules that apply to professional screenwriting that will make you crazy. 

I recommend just writing stories at first without worrying about format. Obviously you've got a gig that lends itself to the writing of science fiction. Find a way to use the knowledge you're gathering at your job, knowledge those of us who don't work at NASA can only dream about. Develop your descriptive skills without giving yourself a headache over whether you're creating a main character that will attract a bankable star, or any of the other things that screenwriters have to constantly take into account when they sit down to write. Worrying about how Hollywood will react to your writing is like worrying about how Detroit will react to your car design. Just worry about doing good work.

MD

Send your questions to "Ask Dr. Hollywood" at disinfotainment@earthlink.net

Calling All Filmmakers

Film Festivals in Bermuda, Florida, Memphis, San Francisco, Park City, Palm Beach and Sonoma, are CURRENTLY looking for films. 

 

WHO’S GOING TO HELL THIS WEEK?

by Helen A. Handbasket

You never know who’s going to trade their soul away or what they’re going to get for it unless you’re Helen A. Handbasket, ex-executive chief in charge of operations for the burning flames of hellfire. Who are her sources? Wouldn’t you like to know? Sorry, all communications are confidential and the property of Helen A. Handbasket, whose opinions do not necessarily reflect those of this or any other publication. 

October 21, 2002

UNDO THE COUP
Satan for President in 2004

CARTOON FROM HELL

 

HISTORY LESSON FROM HELL

When Australia's first European Explorers saw a strange animal as tall as a human, leaping around like giant grasshoppers, they couldn't believe their eyes. They asked Australia's original inhabitants, the Aborigines, "What are these animals?" They replied "kangaroo," which means "I don't understand you" in the Aborigines' language. The Europeans thought they were referring to the animals which they named Kangaroos.

SLOGAN FROM HELL

The State of Massachusetts paid an ad agency $300,000 to come up with the slogan "Massachusetts...make it yours." Satan offers $300,000 to anyone who can explain what that means.

ANALOGY FROM HELL

Senator Zell Miller co-sponsored the Iraq Resolution, explaining why Saddam Hussein must go with this analogy about why you have to kill snakes you find around your house, but not explaining why you have to kill snakes in the middle of the desert 9,000 miles away from your house.

CANDY FROM HELL

Not enough lead in your chocolate?

SATAN DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW

To keep cauliflower white while cooking, just add a little milk to the water.

QUIZ FROM HELL

Which one of these stories is a load of shit?

A) 24 Ways Republicans Lie.

B) 50 Reasons why the Democrats are hypocrites.

C) 6 tons of fertilizer is missing from Disney World.

QUOTES FROM HELL

"The more invested we are in the picture we have of ourselves as good people, the harder it becomes to see our faults. The less we look at our faults, the more we blame others. The more we blame others, the more rage we will elicit in those we blame. The more we do this without allowing those we blame to be heard, the closer to mutual destruction we are."
- Jennifer Van Bergen, from Dark Forces & The Game of Mass Destruction - 

"I miss the good old days of the Nixon era, when a president breaking the law was grounds for impeachment, a charge of bribery could get a vice-president a resignation/jail term, and extra-marital affairs in the govmint were winked at.  It was way cheaper than the soon-to-come reagan/bush savings & loan taxpayer drain, the politically-driven umpteen $million clinton impeachment, and 30 year deficits wiped out in 8 years, only to reappear in less than a year."
- dburke11 -

"We have the same water on this planet we had at creation...it just goes around and around. There are no water 'shortages,' just logistical problems in delivery."
- Lewis Goldberg at loudcitizen.com -

There are no permanent alliances, only permanent interests. 
- Lord Palmerston, 19th century British Foreign Secretary -

"The good Lord didn't see fit to put oil and gas only where there are democratically-elected regimes friendly to the United States. Occasionally we have to operate in places where, all things considered, one would not normally choose to go. But we go where the business is."
- Dick Cheney in 1998, when he was CEO of Halliburton Oil, doing business with Iraq at the time -

"Every bureaucracy in this town [Washington] is scared to death of an investigation...Remember, no one has really been held accountable. No one has lost their job, no one has been even reprimanded, nothing has happened as a result of Sept. 11. Unless responsibility is assigned, then we can't cure the problem."
- Sen. John McCain, New York Times, Oct. 12, 2002 -

"We've been talking to the White House for months...They keep saying, `We just have this one little thing to fix.' So we fix that, and they come up with three other things. They're not really negotiating in good faith."
- Stephen Push, husband of 9/11 victim Lisa Raines, referring to the Bush administration's resistance to an independent investigation, as quoted in the New York Times, Oct. 12, 2002 -

"It belongs to human nature to hate those you have injured."
- Tacitus -

"Without forgiveness life is governed by an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation."
- Author Unknown -

"The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is."
- George Bernard Shaw -

"Credible reports have upwards of half-million Iraqis dying from third world diseases like typhoid or dysentery over the last 11 years; because in ’91 we bombed Baghdad’s water purification and sewage treatment plants, covering the cradle of civilization with excrement, then embargoed chlorine for a decade (because it’s used in making poison gases)."
- Michael Hammerschlag in Bush's Wanton War -

"When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?"
- Eleanor Roosevelt -

"All violence, all that is dreary and repels, is not power, but the absence of power."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson -

"I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in."
- George McGovern -

"If you want to make peace, you don't talk to your friends. You talk to your enemies."
- Moshe Dayan -

"I don't have to support the moron. I'm an American, not a jockstrap!"
- Bob Witkowski - 

"We despise all reverences and all the objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our own list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us."
- Mark Twain -

"Check this out, it was the SECRET SERVICE that was notified!!! Does anyone have a closer link to the resident and vice resident than the SECRET SERVICE? I think not. This explains why Bush kept reading to the children in Florida for 1/2 hour after the attack. It explains why he watched the hits on TV before he began reading. It explains why he and others in elite positions were vaccinated for anthrax before there was any word of an anthrax problem. Aren't the members of the Bush cabal terrorists? I think so. Forget about Saddam, we've got bigger problems."
- Gush Shalom ad published in Ha'aretz, September 27, 2002 -

"The advertisement is the most truthful part of a newspaper."
- Thomas Jefferson -

"Of the lessons also gained from the history of mankind is the fact that greed and arrogance, when combined, lead the oppressor to do injustice not only to others, but to himself as well; once this combination of greed and arrogance has misled him into a sense of undefeatable capability and power, as he takes the road of falsehood and aggression, committing the most heinous acts and proceeding from that sick imagination, to fall down the precipice and then into hell."
- Saddam Hussein, Aug. 8, 2002 -

DICTIONARY FROM HELL

Excerpts From The Newly Released Merriam-Webster Bush Dictionary.

SITES FROM HELL

Mandatory reading: A complete guide to every political party in the United States.

The Bush/Nazi connection is explored in this fascinating site, Heir to the Holocaust, showing how the Bush family wealth is linked to Auschwitz.

Of course the fact that North Korea has nuclear weapons is entirely Bill Clinton's fault (not to mention Albert Einstein's).

At Newsbull they believe that all news is local. Newsbull was designed for people to respond to media bias in their hometown newspaper. Newsbull has over 1,000 cites with more than 100 forum categories. Each city also has a local news links section.

November 19th is National Ammo BUYcott Day. Buy 100 extra rounds of ammo but don't shoot anybody.

And while you're BUYcotting ammo, why not Boycott America?

Nobody's got more disgusting news than BangedUp.

Rachel Lucas explains guns and crime to stupid people.

Forget the police, if we want to stop crime, all we need is more little old ladies with guns.

What are we going to do with all that oil once we take over Iraq? Wouldn't you know we're already discussing it with the Iraqis we're going to let live. 

If the manhunt for the Washington-area sniper were being handled like the rest of the War on Terror, the story might go something like this: FBI Targets Elderly Women As "Persons Of Interest" In Sniper Investigation.

At this site, you can interactively unwrap a mummy. (I'm keeping the site where you can interactively unwrap Anna Nicole Smith to myself)

All things atomic at conelrad. Great look at the way things were in America during the cold war.

Aren't you glad there's a site that's dedicated to the eradication of liberals?

Was the bomb used in the terrorist attack in Bali a "micro-nuke?" No, according to the major media. Yeah, according to this site, full of graphic and disturbing pictures. 

Did you know the tobacco industry is spending $26 million DAILY to market 
cigarettes to kids? Here's a place you can do something about it.

Cold bacon may be a lousy thing to eat but it's a great place to go for multimedia, music, and intelligent writing. (Wide Bandwidth!)

Oh, wow, they've finally gotten around to prosecuting someone for the California energy debacle, some guy in Enron's Portland office. Can you say scapegoat? I knew you could.

Of course the real mystery of the California energy crisis is how could a $30 billion robbery take place in broad daylight?

Oh, by the way, according to Israeli intelligence, Bin Laden is dead and his heir has been chosen.