Celebrities vs. the United States Government

Fan Mail

Sir,

One of your links to americanfreepress.net contains a huge amount of articles that seem to be obsessed with Jews, Israel, the "Zionist Conspiracy", etc... One article starts out: "Were those hijackers really Arabs? Would Israeli agents carry out a suicide mission that could cost American Jewish lives? Consider these little-known facts . . . " Check out these other stories, look at their slant, what they're emphasizing... I'll have to do some research to find out who owns this site, but I'm very certain it's a neo-Nazi group. Don't take my word for it... look at what else is on the site. Do you really want to support this sort of crap?

-Josh

  Josh,

Thank you for braving time and space to contact me.

There's a big difference between anti-Zionist and neo-Nazi. I'm Jewish and anti-Zionist which tells you something right there. Zionists are to Jews what al-Qaeda are to Muslims, the lunatic fringe who think we have a God-given right to a plot of land, and who will do anything to keep it in their hands.

The American Free Press site is decidedly anti-Zionist, pressing forth the case that Zionists may, in fact, have been behind the events of 9/11, a theory dismissed off-hand by the western media, who accept whole-heartedly the "official" version of what happened. They may or may not have a valid case, but in checking out the rest of the site, like "about our newspaper" or "huge subject archive" or even "editorials/opinion," I see nothing even slightly racist. Racism/Nazism blames the ENTIRE JEWISH RACE rather than the Zionist movement within the race. Calling an anti-Zionist a neo-Nazi is sort of like calling me anti-American just because I'm anti-Republican.

Of course in this, as in all matters, I might be wrong. Can't apologize for a column with the word "disinfotainment" in the title.

Thanks for keeping me on my toes. Now I'm a ballerina.

MD

Disinfotainment Today

- Volume One: The Early Years -

   Disinfotainment Today was born in a log cabin on the shores of The Comedy Store. As a child, Disinfotainment Today defied all expectations by being the first newspaper in the seventh grade to use the word "blowjob" twice in one article. Dropping out of high school, Disinfotainment Today hitchhiked across the country with nothing but a guitar, suitcase, and sleeping bag, riding the rails, making new friends, visiting fabulous out-of-the-way places and taking notes on endless roles of paper towels and vowing vengeance against its enemies. 
     Disinfotainment Today was furious. It didn't know what the hell the writer was talking about. It was nowhere near the scene in question, and had certainly never hitchhiked anywhere. Disinfotainment Today disavows any knowledge of anything that may or may not have happened between then and now.

And Now Back to Our Regularly Scheduled Madness

Awww, Poor Baby

Jim Carrey's ex-wife is suing him for more child support, claiming $10,000 a month isn't enough to raise his one daughter. She filed court papers claiming she pays for classes in drama, music recording and arranging, singing, tennis, dance, and computers but doesn't have enough for horseback riding lessons or a private ski instructor.

Pick a Caption

#1
"I wish to bring blowjobs back to the White House,"
declared a member of the Iraqi Gay Liberation Front
#2
An Iraqi tries to suck the brain out of George W. Bush,
little realizing that a) it's just a poster and b) his brain 
has already been sucked out

Can I Have the Wishbone?

Ingrid Newkirk, 53, president of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, has drawn up a will directing that her flesh be barbecued and her skin used to make leather products in protest at man's ill-treatment of animals.

How We Won the War

The details of the offer, approved by Rumsfeld, that were made to both the Republican Guard and Saddam's Fedayeen. In return for ceasing all opposition and laying down their arms, the U.S. was prepared to provide:
- Transportation for the Republican Guard's top echelon to secure locations outside Iraq.
- Transportation of second-rank Republican Guard leaders to "liberated" places inside Iraq that the coalition forces already controlled. 
- Huge sums of money to the top echelon of the Republican Guard. Second-ranking officers were offered lower, but still sizable, amounts of cash.
- Amnesty to some of the top leaders of the Republican Guard.
- Official roles in "liberated" Iraq after the end of the war, to those who had not committed "war crimes," under Saddam's regime.
- U.S. citizenship and residency in the United States to the top commanders and their families, if they so desired.

I Feel So Much Safer Now

The NRA is putting up an anti-terrorism website.

A secret Donald Rumsfeld memorandum calling for regime change in North Korea.

Creative Associates International, a private company based in Washington DC, has won a contract from US AID to remake Iraq's school system and purge it of pro-Saddam propaganda. AID says the new program will use "politically neutral course content." 

Awww, Poor Baby II

Irena Medavoy is suing her doctor for giving her Botox shots that were a bit more painful than she expected. Because of the shots, she says she "missed the Vanity Fair Oscar party, missed going to the Oscars. That Monday we were supposed to go to Maui - which I was SO looking forward to. I missed that. I missed our anniversary trip. We were going to spend the month of June in Europe, going to Paris and then on a boat in the South of France. I missed that. People had invited me to Aspen for August. I missed that."
- Quoted from Vanity Fair -

Don't Take My Word For It

"If there's ever a problem, I film it and it's no longer a problem. It's a film."
- Andy Warhol -

"Never look down on anybody unless you're helping them up." 
- Jesse Jackson -

"When Baghdad fell to the Mongols in 1258, these books survived. If you talk to any intellectual Muslims in the world, they are crying right now."
- an official from The Ministry for Religious Affairs in Baghdad which was set on fire, destroying thousands of Korans, some a thousand years old -

"I am strongly in favour of using poisoned gas against uncivilised tribes [to] spread a lively terror" 
- Winston Churchill -

"There's no such thing as objectivity in anything in the human realm. All media is descending to the level of propaganda." 
- Bill Weinberg -

"The bigger the lie, the more people will believe it."
- Joseph Goebbels -

"I would not have been surprised if some ardent patriot, infused with the glow of patriotism for the glorious George W. had broke a window at the Liquor Warehouse and started a fire to toast the Iraqis and their new found freedom. What better way to celebrate America's victory over the sinister forces of peace, diplomacy and the UN here at home than doing what the Iraqis did?"
- Bob Boudelang: Hooray For Our Great President's War Which is Not a Failure Even Though There Are No WMDs!! -

"Dissent is the highest form of patriotism."
- Thomas Jefferson -

"Democracy is beautiful. It will take time to restore chaos."
- George W. Bush on CNN -

What Posters Would Christ Put Up in His Dorm?

More Christian anti-war posters at Damage Control

Self-Serving Plug

Disinfotainment Today

Stupid Poem of the Week To stand on your head, stand on your head.
To get lost, get lost.
To get smart, get smart.
To make movies, make movies.
To make music, make music.
To write, write.
To talk, talk.
To shut up, shut up.
To please yourself, please yourself.
To please others, please others.
To look good, look good.
To get fat, get fat.
To lose weight, lose weight.
To get famous, get famous.
To make a lot of money, make a lot of money.
To spend a lot of money, spend a lot of money.
To hate, hate.
To love, love.
To live a long life, live a long life.
To tell the truth, tell the truth.
To live a lie, live a lie.
To control people, control people.
To lay back, lay back.
To condone, condone.
To wrap yourself in bliss, wrap yourself in bliss.
To avenge, avenge.
To gather followers, gather followers.
To repulse, repulse.
To listen to your heart, stop doing anything else.

Why Am I Not Surprised?

According to a CIA analyst, all those Kurds were gassed by Iran, not Iraq.

The Anti-Defamation League has been found guilty of defamation.

A prominent Republican fund-raiser who once said former President Bill Clinton was "a lawbreaker and a terrible example to our nation's young people" pleaded guilty in Baltimore Circuit Court to production of child pornography.

The third-ranking Republican member of the U.S. Senate, conservative Rick Santorum (Pa.), plans to introduce so-called "ideological diversity" legislation that would cut federal funding for thousands of American colleges and universities if those institutions are found to be permitting professors, students and student organizations to openly criticize Israel.

Closed captions for ABC's World News Tonight reported that Alan Greenspan was being treated "For an enlarged prostitute."

Because he was scared of SARS, a man killed a fisherman for sneezing near him.

Pizza Hut and Burger King set up their first Iraqi franchises, on a British military base near Basra. 

Cameroon made it illegal for restaurants to serve gorilla. 

America disabled an oil pipeline that had been carrying 200,000 barrels a day from Iraq to Syria, in flagrant violation of United Nations economic sanctions.

And I Haven't Seen a Penny

Investigators revealed that a retired banker living in Switzerland spent 10 years helping Saddam Hussein hide millions of dollars via a Bahamas bank account under the name of Satan. 

Belated Christmas Gifts

Get yourself a King of Pop action figure.

The Shiloh Tour package will charge $5,500 to 22 young Americans and Canadians, some Jewish, to experience a week on the front lines in Israel's "War on Terror," including five days living in an illegal Jewish settlement in the occupied West Bank.

History Lessons from Hell

The whole story

Adolf Hitler planned September 11-style suicide plane attacks on New York skyscrapers. Hitler ordered Second World War engineers to design a transatlantic bomber with a kamikaze pilot and plane slung underneath. The mother plane would get as close as possible, then launch the flying bombs "into structures like the Empire State and Chrysler buildings". Hitler saw the skyscrapers as symbols of U.S. power. He also told a top woman pilot to form suicide squadrons. The plans, which never left the drawing board because pilots wouldn't volunteer, were found in archives in Berlin.

The whole story of precisely how Saddam Hussein came into power in the first place.

Mr. Conspiracy Says...

Iraq will get the same democracy we have; an electoral college that allows the loser to win the election and a Supreme Court that gets to appoint a president no matter who wins the election.

The Subtlest Put-down of the week.

The Idiot Son of an Asshole.

If Only Pamela Anderson Were an Iraqi

U.S. Forces Made Iraqis Strip and Walk Naked in Public.
 

Hitler had a mustache.Hitler was elected.

Adapted from this.

Everything Else

Mandatory reading: Why won't Washington allow the UN weapons inspectors into Iraq? by Peter Symonds.

The lowdown on Richard Perle. Made in the USA by Jim Crogan is a definitive rundown of American companies and government agencies that built Saddam Hussein’s war machine.

Test your geography knowledge with this excellent page.

At Dumb Warnings, you can read about stuff like the toy Harry Potter Broom with a label that says "Warning, this broom does not actually fly."

Are all the links in your FAVORITES list still valid? Check them out with this simple program.

Catch some free new episodes of Wallace and Gromit.

Iraq's one unqualified victory in the war corporate takeover.

Once he's out of work, George W. Bush will be using this résumé.