"Just Say Know"
Issue #86
is brought to you by...
The New Year
"Just Say Know"
Issue #86
is brought to you by...
The New Year
 |
|
|
Posted December 29, 2003 The Spirit of Christmas in
the Holy Land
Palestinians dressed as Mary and Joseph are stopped and turned away by an Israeli soldier, as they try to enter the West Bank city of Bethlehem, December 23, 2003. The two were protesting the lack of freedom of movement for Palestinians, making virtually impossible to celebrate Christmas. Buried Story of the Week
"Congress authorizes Ashcroft to track gold
in the U.S."
"Remember, in the Kingdom of Antichrist, no
one will be able to buy or sell unless he has the 'Mark of the Beast.'
Therefore, one of the changes that must be made in the 'Preparatory Period'
leading up to the appearance of Antichrist must be implementation of total
control over economic transactions. No one can be allowed to 'buy or sell'
using gold bullion and/or gold coins. Thus, this story makes a lot of sense."
"As Franklin D. Roosevelt
was inaugurated as president on March 4, 1933, Americans were in a state
of panic. Banks were failing every day, and people clamoured by the thousands
to withdraw their money. Ordinarily they might have accepted paper money
in the form of gold certificates, but people feared that the government
might simply resort to printing worthless money to meet the massive withdrawal
requests. They didn't want paper. They wanted gold. Furthermore, people
who had gold certificates rushed to redeem them for real gold.
"This is a targeted action; I am the target."
Ironic
Times Man of the Year
From defying President Bush in the
face of a massive military invasion, to living on the run with 200,000
American soldiers pursuing him, to interfering with a foul ball during
a crucial Chicago Cubs-Florida Marlins playoff game, to finally being captured
hiding in a hole not far from his birthplace in Iraq, it was quite a year
for our Man of the Year, Saddam Hussein.
 Dubya signed the Patriot Act II into law on the very day everyone was distracted by the capture of Saddam Hussein. First they capture Saddam, then Dubya tells us we're safer, then they raise the terrorism alert status to "Orange - high risk."
Where can you hear Herve Villechaize sing "Why Do People Have to Fight?", Joe Pesci singing "Got to Get You Into My Life," Johnny Cash singing "I Walk the Line" in German, and Masturbation Tips from the New York Health System (Women, don't use a bottle)? Cover your ears and go to April Winchell: Multimedia. For new years, don't miss Jimi Hendrick's version of Auld Lang Syne. I Feel So Much Safer Now Got an OnStar system in your car? The FBI can eavesdrop on your conversations. ("When making public policy decisions about new technologies for the Government, I think one should ask oneself which technologies would best strengthen the hand of a police state. Then, do not allow the Government to deploy those technologies." - Philip Zimmermann -) An 11-year-old boy was locked in a police cell for six hours after he was caught building a treehouse in a park. Ruby Barber, a grandmother in England who had been repeatedly burglarized, decided to surround her house with barbed wire to protect it from intruders. Her request was denied because it "might hurt burglars." A storm of protest eventually caused the Northampton Borough Council to relent. Barber, they ruled, could surround her garden with razor wire. But there was a catch--she must take the precaution of posting warning signs and "agree to take full responsibility if a would-be intruder is injured." An IRS official who created a program to ensure that companies couldn't hide profits abroad, recently left to work for a big accounting firm where he's helping companies avoid the rules he wrote. Scientists have created a new super-tuberculosis. Scientists in Montana are creating gallons of concentrated pathogens. The United States has rejected the International Bioweapons Protocol. Gosh, since if Saddam didn't unleash any of the biological weapons that he was supplied with by America on Americans, will Bush do it for him and make it look like Saddam did it? Belated Christmas Gift From
Hell
Too bad it's too late to get your loved one a chia Christ for Christmas. Boo Fucking Hoo Michael Jackson says he was manhandled when they arrested him. Question 60 Minutes forgot to ask: "How come you don't sleep with little girls too?" Slyest Subject Headings for Penis-Enlargement E-mails
Shockwaves of the Week Absolutely, without a doubt, the best Christmas ad I've ever seen. At Mr. Picassohead, you can make faces the way faces were meant to be made. Gee, For That Price He Could Have Bought a Whole Man A Florida man sold the domain name "men.com" for $1.3 million. Corporate Profit Over People's
Lives
"I said on the floor of the House that you
will rue the day that because of the greed of the industry to make a few
extra pennies from 130,000 head, the industry would sacrifice the safety
of the American people. It's so pound foolish."
Don't freak out. There's a difference between an outbreak and an epidemic. "We consumed beef to gain power over nature
and our fellow human beings ... by choosing not to eat the flesh of cattle,
we serve notice of our willingness to enter into a new covenant with this
creature ... Freeing the bovine from the pain and indignities suffered
on the modern mega-feedlots and in the slaughterhouses is a humane act
of great symbolic and practical import. Liberating these creatures from
the process of dehorning, castration, and estrus-blocking, from forced
hormone injections, massive doses of antibiotics, insecticide showers,
and an ignoble death on an automated assembly-line kill floor, is an act
of contrition. It is an acknowledgment of the damage we moderns have inflicted
on the whole of creation in pursuit of unrestrained power over the forces
of nature."
You can't contract the human form of the disease through just eating meat--you need to eat some nervous system tissue, which apparently is in hot dogs, bologna, and other delicacies. Rendered meat isn't allowed to be fed to cows, but they can end up eating it anyway, since it is allowed to be given to chickens and leftover chicken food can be sold as cattle feed. Here's a guide to what parts of the cow you can safely eat. Why Howard Dean Should Pick Paris Hilton as His Running Mate More people watched her idiotic show on Fox than watched Diane Sawyer's interview with Dubya. How Christmas is Celebrated in Saudi Arabia By a trip to jail, if you try it outside. According to the most recent State Department report on religious freedom, the public practice of any religion other than Islam can result in "arrest, imprisonment, lashing, deportation, and sometimes torture." A U.S. law calls for the president to "designate each country" that "has engaged in or tolerated particularly severe violations of religious freedom." Saudi Arabia isn't on the list. Gallery of the Week 
Naoto Hattori is out of his mind, but in a good way. Don't Take My Word For It "You take a chance getting
up in the morning, crossing the street or sticking your face in a fan."
"Some people wear their
faith like an overcoat. It only warms them, but does not benefit others
at all. But others light a fire and also warm others."
"Iraq is a swamp. The
Great Satan will get caught in that swamp; and that will speed up its inevitable
collapse."
"If I were reincarnated
I would wish to be returned to earth as a killer virus to lower human population
levels."
"I hope that other countries
in the region... would follow such an example... get rid of and put an
end to any nuclear weapons production program. You know, of course, who
I mean."
"Anyone who can handle
a needle convincingly can make us see a thread which is not there."
"It is said that power
corrupts, but actually it's more true that power attracts the corruptible.
The sane are usually attracted by other things than power."
"This atrocious doctrine
of allegiance to party plays directly into the hands of politicians of
the baser sort - and doubtless for that it was borrowed - or stolen - from
the monarchical system."
"Truth, indeed, rather
alleviates than hurts, and will always bear up against falsehood, as oil
does above water."
"No matter how far you
have gone on the wrong road, turn back."
"There is a direct affinity
between large corporations and big governments in that they use the same
paths to profit: Large corporations routinely lie to their customers and
investors; big governments routinely lie to their citizens and other nations.
This is the way the game is played in the incipient 21st Century. But the
game is unraveling, the rules are changing; this is the last gasp of the
robber barons, and the desperate looks masked by the confident smiles betray
that they have much to fear. They are the withering end of an evolution
in social progress and they know it, if barely."
"In George Orwell's '1984'
one of EngSoc's three 'truths' was 'Ignorance Is Strength.' Have you ever
noticed how ignorant people have a great deal of strength in their convictions?
Not being able to think is, at least subconsciously, terrifying. Unable
to arrive at ideas and understandings on one's own, every idea must be
held onto like a life preserver in the sea beside a sinking ship. Every
idea is as important as every other idea because there is no mechanism
to judge between them. 'Authority' (the Church-School-State Establishment)
is strengthened by ignorance as well. The ignorant must rely on Authority
for opinions. This keeps Authority on top. The 'conspiracy' has a vested
interest in maintaining this druggie-like dependence on Authority. It is
a very short 'hokey-pokey' little step from authoritarianism to totalitarianism."
"Under the law, I am
entitled to legal representation and to be present to defend myself against
their accusations. Because of the U.S. Parole Commissions clear and deliberate
violation of the law, in the real world, this appeal should be an open
and shut case and I should be released immediately on parole. But this
is not the real world, it is my world. Remember? The U.S. Parole Commission
was dissolved in 1987 and ordered by Congress to give all prisoners sentenced
under the old laws their parole dates. Its 2003. The Commission still has
not done this. The Commission remains in power and is being allowed to
violate the law of the land."
"I don't feel we did
wrong in taking this great country away from them. There were great numbers
of people who needed new land, and the Indians were selfishly trying to
keep it for themselves."
"I was provided with
additional input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted
in furthering that version."
"Caution: Cape does not
enable user to fly."
"Former Iraqi President
Saddam Hussein, now being grilled by American investigators, has reportedly
warned US authorities that he will expose Washington's political games
and its behind-the-scene role in the occupation of Kuwait."
"We are grateful to the
Washington Post, the NY Times, Time Magazine and other great publications
whose directors have attended our meetings and respected their promises
of discretion for almost 40 years....It would have been impossible for
us to develop our plan for the world if we had been subjected to the lights
of publicity during those years. But, the world is more sophisticated and
prepared to march towards a world government. The supernational sovereignty
of an intellectual elite and world bankers is surely preferable to the
national autodetermination practiced in past centuries."
"Whenever I talk to a
band who are about to sign with a major label, I always end up thinking
of them in a particular context. I imagine a trench, about four feet wide
and five feet deep, maybe sixty yards long, filled with runny, decaying
shit. I imagine these people, some of them good friends, some of them barely
acquaintances, at one end of this trench. I also imagine a faceless industry
lackey at the other end, holding a fountain pen and a contract waiting
to be signed."
"By doing evil, one defiles
oneself;
"If you dig deep enough,
everyone has a reason to be miserable at Christmas."
"In the previous 43 years,
of the 11 landers sent to Mars, only three have succeeded -- Vikings 1
and 2 and Mars Pathfinder. All the others have been lost en route or during
the landing phase."
"Politics offers yesterday's
answers to today's questions."
"Unless wiser heads in
the upper reaches of the Bush administration prevail, underlings in the
Interior Department are about to deliver a low blow to honesty and integrity
in government. For responding with the truth to questions from The Post
and other news outlets about staffing in her department, U.S. Park Police
Chief Teresa Chambers has been placed on leave and notified that superiors
in the National Park Service and Interior want her fired. And what was
the chief's transgression? She said her understaffed department had to
curtail critical patrols in Park Service jurisdictions beyond the Mall,
such as major parkways and crime-ridden U.S. parkland in neighborhoods,
because of Interior Department orders requiring more officers to guard
downtown national shrines. The impending action ought to be reversed. Ms.
Chambers should be commended for speaking up for public safety. The Interior
Department underlings trying to muzzle her are the ones who should be on
their way out the door."
"Civil disobedience is
not our problem. Our problem is civil obedience. Our problem is that numbers
of people all over the world have obeyed dictates of the leaders of their
government and have gone to war, and millions have been killed because
of this obedience. Our problem is that people are obedient all over the
world in the face of poverty and starvation and stupidity, and war, and
cruelty. Our problem is that people are obedient while the jails are full
of petty thieves, and all the while the grand thieves are running and robbing
the country. That's our problem."
"The
only way to extricate ourselves from the Iraqi Quagmire is to use the exits.
Take half the dough earmarked for rebuilding and give it to the UN. Then,
as John Kerry might say, get the fuck out. There's no other sane choice.
Too many people who hate Bush's America already live there. Thousands more
are making the commute. In November 2003, 79 American families were notified
that their soldier parents, offspring, spouses, or siblings would never
again celebrate Thanksgiving with them.
"The 21st Century opens with the trial of the century. You think it's a
'slam dunk' that Saddam will be tried and executed? Think again.
"Journalists
make the argument that it is sometimes necessary to protect whistle-blowers
from reprisals for exposing the truth. However, that argument is undermined
by the increasingly common practice of government sources using reporters
to spread falsehoods or discredit foes, knowing reporters will hide their
identity.
"About
165 communities nationwide have passed resolutions condemning the USA Patriot
Act. But one little city in northern California has taken its opposition
a step further, making it a misdemeanor for city employees to cooperate
in enforcing the federal antiterrorism measure.
"President Bush went
around Congress on Friday and installed 12 people to government panels
after their nominations stalled in the Senate. The nominations had languished
in the Senate for periods ranging from six weeks to 22 months. By approving
them during the congressional recess, Bush bypassed the Senate confirmation
process. Such appointments are valid until the next Congress takes office,
in this case in January 2005.
"Last year two major
Israeli Ecstasy traffickers were extradited to the United States, much
to the displeasure of the Israeli government. The DEA claims 'Israeli organized
crime figures' control around 70 percent of the worldwide market in Ecstasy."
"The fact that an opinion
has been widely held is no evidence whatsoever that it is not utterly absurd."
"The authorities grossly
understated the death toll from hurricane Andrew, the worst natural disaster
in US history, and left thousands of survivors to die in a zone contaminated
by radiation."
"I cannot undertake to
lay my finger on that article of the Constitution which granted a right
to Congress of expending, on objects of benevolence, the money of their
constituents."
"Whenever the legislators
endeavor to take away and destroy the property of the people, or to reduce
them to slavery under arbitrary power, they put themselves into a state
of war with the people, who are thereupon absolved from any further obedience."
"I wouldn't go to war
again as I have done to protect some lousy investment of the bankers. There
are only two things we should fight for. One is the defense of our homes
and the other is the Bill of Rights. War for any other reason is simply
a racket."
"Fearing roadside bombs
and sniper bullets, members of the U.S. Army Reserve's 428th Transportation
Company turned to a local steel fabricator to fashion extra armor for their
five-ton trucks and Humvees before beginning their journey to Iraq earlier
this month. But their armor might not make it into the war, because the
soldiers did not obtain Pentagon approval for their homemade protection."
"In the last five years
5,690 veterans have lost their jobs in both the private and public sectors
while activated to serve a tour of duty, according to a U.S. Department
of Labor report presented to Congress this year. Those numbers are expected
to increase because, of the 300,000 deployed reservists, as many as 25,000
veterans are expected to return home in 2005 to reintegrate themselves
back into civilian life after a tour of duty in the global war against
terrorism. Of those 300,000, about 20,000 work for the federal government."
"If, instead of welcoming
inquiry and criticism, the admirers of a great author accept his writings
as authoritative, both in their excellences and in their defects, the most
serious injury is done to truth. In matters of philosophy and science,
authority has ever been the great opponent of truth. A despotic calm is
usually the triumph of error. In the republic of the sciences, sedition
and even anarchy are beneficial in the long run to the greatest happiness
of the greatest number."
"To All of our Customers
Who are Male and Age 18 through 25: Effective November 3, 2003: Completion
of this application will be considered as proof of your consent to be registered
with the Selective Service System per the requirements of Federal and State
Law. If you decline to register, your application for a driver license,
learner's permit or ID card will be denied.
"I am the only candidate
who voted against the war on Iraq and who consistently opposed it. I am
the only candidate who sued the President to try to prevent him from going
to war without a declaration from Congress. I am the only candidate who
will repeal NAFTA and withdraw from the WTO, replacing these agreements
that have cost us so many hundreds of thousands of jobs with fair bilateral
trade agreements that protect jobs, workers' rights, human rights, and
environmental quality principles. I am the only candidate with a single-payer
plan that provides every man, woman, and child with comprehensive health
coverage from whatever doctors they choose, and does so through a tax on
employers that is lower than what employers who now provide coverage pay
on average. I am the only candidate who voted against the 'Patriot Act'
and who has introduced a bill to repeal major sections of it. I am the
only candidate who will redirect our priorities from war and tax cuts for
millionaires to peace and education, including free college tuition. I
am the only candidate who will make 20 percent of our energy use renewables
rather than fossil fuels by 2010. I am the only candidate who will focus
on breaking up monopolies, including agri-business monopolies and media
monopolies."
"You pus-sucking corporate-lovin'
airheaded up-chuck-inspiring butt-licking prick!!"
"The workers, they want
nothing but bread and games. In the great mass they are not worth consideration.
We must build a master class from elements of a better race."
"The greatest honor is
to plant a tree from which you will never eat the fruit."
"There ain't no one out
there who's a fuckin' threat to us, okay? They don't exist. I'm talking
now only of countries we don't arm first."
About Fucking Time and So What Lenny Bruce has been granted a posthumous pardon by the state of New York 40 years after he was convicted in an obscenity case. Everything Else Mandatory reading: The Top 25 Censored Media Stories of 2002-2003. Whatayuh think of the Kucinich/Clinton ticket? That's right, the skuttlebutt is that Dennis is going to ask Hillary to be his vice. Of course who knows if she'll say yes, but you heard it here first unless you read it somewhere else. A U.S. spy has confirmed that David Kelley did not commit suicide, which is what his family has been saying all along. About one out of 10 teachers in America's public schools say they were threatened with injury or physical attack between 1999 and 2000. Don't understand Elvish? Check out this guide to Tolkein languages. What is the sound of one hand clapping? Check out the winners of the annual Snow Sculpture Contest. They Might be Giants has a kid's book out, and as you might imagine, it's very strange and wonderful, at least the net version. Don't miss the Idyllwild video. According to CNN, here are the 10 technologies to watch in 2004. Hey kids, play with a current satellite view of earth. It's such an honor that these celebrities refused knighthood. A fascinating collection of seldom asked questions about Japan. In 2003, Brightmail saw spam surpass legitimate e-mail, growing to more than 56 percent of all Internet e-mail, up from just 40 percent a year ago. By the end of 2004, some experts estimate that 9 out of 10 messages in your inbox will be spam. Look up an ailment, find out what herb to take. Look up an herb, find out what ailment it treats. Yep, it's the Healing Herb Database. A fabulous collection of very sexy pictures. Is your pet dog or cat a cannibal? It is if
you feed it commercial pet food from a company that
Here's the real person of the year, the Anti-War Protester. |
Last Disinfotainment Today
Issue
#85
Next Disinfotainment Today
Issue
#87
Don't Let This Happen to You Subscribe. |
|
| WARNING TO THOSE ON AOL
This column is sent out in HTML format which can only be seen with AOL 6.0 or better, so upgrade or go to hell. Powered by groups.yahoo.com |
|
Contact pResident Bush
- president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Jeb Bush - jeb.bush@myflorida.com
Contact Saddam Hussein
- president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Kim Jong Il -
eng-info@kcna.co.jp
Contact Jacques Chirac
- france-presse@un.int
Contact the Pope - accreditamenti@pressva.va
Embassy of France in
the US: 202-944-6000
German Embassy in the
US: 202-298-4000
Embassy of the Russian
Federation: 202-298-5700
Embassy of the People's
Republic of China: 202-328-2500
White House switchboard:
(202) 456-1414
Contact your Senator
Contact your Representative
House and Senate switchboard:
(202) 224-3121
Links
to Central Government Agencies
Am I supposed to believe
you don't drink coffee?
You need a Disinfotainment
Today mug.
Acknowledgment
dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is free and
may be reproduced in any form. It consists of information from dozens of
sources, cut up, thrown in the air, and recycled randomly. It is sent all
over the place, so I apologize if you're seeing the same thing twice. If
you see a joke, graphic, or news item that came from or through you, thanks,
send more, and please accept the fact that much of dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY
is unacknowledgeable, and if I sought permission from everyone whose bastardized
material showed up here, I'd never get anything else done. Please note
that I don't even put my own name on it. If you're still pissed off, hey,
it's fair use.
Thanks,
Satan
